Meredith Herman, DO, University of Michigan Department of Pathology
The day I found out I had failed a course in medical school was a dark moment in my journey. The only words I could utter were, "I am a failure." I felt a crushing sense of disappointment, shame, and fear—fear that I wasn’t cut out for medicine, that I would let down my family, my mentors, and most painfully, myself. The pit in my stomach and tunnel vision debilitated me for weeks. I even considered walking away from my dream altogether.
Yet, as I sit here today, I realize that what I initially saw as the end was, in fact, a turning point. Through resilience, reflection, and the support of others, I found a way to not just persevere but to thrive. This experience reshaped my approach to medicine, academics, and personal growth. It’s a story I share to inspire others facing similar struggles.
In medicine, failure comes in many forms—disappointing grades, a low board score, or a rejected scholarship. Each feels like a setback, a blow to our sense of competence. But in medical training, we’re often not taught how to handle failure. The focus is on achievement, leaving little room to address the emotional and practical tools we need to bounce back. This lack of preparation makes failure feel isolating, as if it’s a personal flaw rather than a shared experience. As a result, many hesitate to seek help, fearing they'll be seen as weak, incompetent, or unworthy.
Acknowledging the Setback
Failing in medical school is devastating, especially in a culture that values success above all else. Success measures our progress, mastery of skills, and advancement in the field. And while success is crucial in medicine—where patients trust us with their lives—the emotional weight of failure still lingers. As I processed my own failure, I realized that I needed help.
I came to understand that I wasn’t alone. Many accomplished physicians shared their own setbacks—failures on exams, rejections from residency programs, or personal challenges that derailed their plans. One of the most important things I did was to embrace self-compassion. Failure feels like an attack on your character, but it isn’t. I gave myself time to grieve the loss of my idealized academic path, sought therapy, and reached out to friends and mentors who reminded me that one setback doesn’t define my potential.
Reevaluating and Reflecting
Once the initial shock faded, I began reflecting on what went wrong. Was it the demanding curriculum? Personal challenges? Inefficient study habits? For me, it was a combination—burnout, poor study strategies, and reluctance to ask for help. Seeking guidance was a turning point. Professors, peers, and mentors gave me invaluable advice, and I connected with others who had faced academic setbacks. I also learned to recognize my strengths and weaknesses, which helped me approach challenges more strategically.
Taking Action
“Fail forward” became my mantra. Turning reflection into action was essential to my growth. I restructured my study routine, focusing on active learning and better time management. During my gap year, I immersed myself in work, research, and mentorship in my chosen specialty—experiences that not only strengthened my resume but also reignited my passion for medicine. Progress wasn’t always linear, and moments of doubt still came up, but I stayed focused on my long-term goals. Each small victory—a solid exam result, a supportive word from a mentor, or mastering a tough concept—kept me moving forward.
Embracing Growth and Success
Failure taught me to redefine success. It’s not about perfection, but growth, resilience, and the ability to rise after falling. This shift in perspective made me a more empathetic physician and a stronger advocate for others facing setbacks.
Today, as a pathology resident at one of the top programs in the country, I’m proof that failure can be a stepping stone, not a dead end. By sharing my story, I hope to normalize conversations about failure and help others see it as an opportunity for transformation.
If you’re reading this and struggling with failure, know this: you are not alone, and this moment does not define you. The journey through hardship can lead to unexpected and rewarding paths, as long as you allow yourself the grace to keep going. Medicine, like life, is as much about resilience as it is about achievement. Failure is not a final destination. It’s a launchpad. Embrace it, learn from it, and let it propel you toward your dreams.
Dr. Meredith Herman is an Anatomic and Clinical Pathology (AP/CP) resident at the University of Michigan. She is deeply committed to advancing the field of pathology through mentorship, medical education, research, social media engagement. X: @meredithkherman